I spent the last two years having the life agonizingly ripped out of me by a person who was supposed to stand by me and protect me forever.
Knowing someone could love as I loved him and be made to suffer for it like he made me… I didn’t want to live in that world where people could be so full of poison. I felt like a broken doll so stripped of all the worth of my love by his utter heartlesness.
So much energy given to another person to receive nothing in return… Child black heart.
When I woke up alive I cried for 3 days, agonizing sobs that brought tears to the eyes of my doctors and motivated my saftey officer to spend an entire shift sitting beside my bed, holding my hand.
I wanted to, after all that, still keep a piece of my heart for him… Some silly hope that he would realize what hrehad lost and actually do something about it. Maybe we would be the team he always said he wanted to be.
He fed me scraps to keep me hanging on… A ghost haunting a life that was never to be.
He never loved me.
He proved that by saying the most cold calloused thing I could dream of knowing it was the last thing he would ever have the chance to say to me.

Now I am free. Free of any love I had try to save for him…
Free of any loyalties I had for him as I now know beyond a shadow of a doubt that it was based in a love only I felt.

The last two years were based in lies.

My heart is free… Fully.

I can fall in love again!!

This time… With someone worthy of that love!